Happy Valenswine’s Day

Everyone knows that Feb. 14th is Valentine’s day, but do you know what Feb. 13th is?  That’s right, Valenswine’s day.  That is the day you take out your “unofficial” girlfriend out while your wife/real girlfriend is at home wondering where you will be taking her the following night.  I’m not making this up.  Go out to any restaraunt and look around, any “couple” you see tonight probably has at least one eye looking over their shoulder to make sure they don’t get caught. 

Valentine’s day is a ficticious day invented by Hallmark and Russell Stover for the sole purpose of making money between Christmas and Easter.  And women love it.  And no matter how skinny your girlfriend/wife is, don’t come home without the chocolate.  She won’t let you forget it until next Valentine’s day.

Both of these days are for women, unlike a comepletely different holiday, March 14, which is steak and blowjob day.  This day is all about the man, and its exactly what is sounds like.  No cards, no roses, no chocolate.  Just a steak and a blowjob.  Isn’t it easy to keep us happy?

I’m going on vacation for a week, so there won’t be any new material until I get back.  Peace out.

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